April 2011
43 posts
Dear Parents....
Jasmine was in a relationship with a dirty homeless boy named Aladdin. Snow White lived alone with 7 men. Pinnochio was a liar. Robin Hood was a thief. Tarzan walked around without clothes on. A stranger kissed sleeping beauty and she married him. Cinderella lied and snuck out at night to attend a party. You can’t blame us. We were taught to rebel since a young age.
Mature Boyfriend and Kiddie Girlfriend
Boy: Hey baby, want to come over tonight?
Girl: Sure! What do you want to do?
Boy: I'll give you a hint. It involves pillows and blankets ;)
Girl: OH MY GOD! WE'RE GONNA BUILD A FORT?!
“Boy + Girl sitting in a tree
K-I-S-S-I-N-G
First comes love, the comes...”
– Today’s Generation
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Facebook Asshole 2
Me: Hey thanks a lot for posting hundreds of videos on facebook and filling up my news feed.
FA: Sorry, I just love Disney songs.
Me: That doesn't mean we want to know every song that you love!
FA: I love irritating my friends thats why i post so many videos at once.
Me: Seriously? Your a very bad friend then...
FA: I just love irritating my friends because I love Disney and they don't!
Me: Urrhhh,.....
Another FB Friend: @FA strange hobby, usually people see to it that they don't irritate their friends.
FA: But I like it.
WHERE THE FUCK IS THIS →
I’ve always wondered… haven’t you?
Cock-A-Doodle-.....What?
Mate: I've been training my parrot to say, "Cock-A-Doodle-Don't"
Me: Uh... why?
Mate: So my stupid neighbors can listen to him and my rooster argue all day.
Modern Proverbs discovered on Twitter - Twitter... →
He who hesitates is lost as Tomorrow is another day because we believe in the fact that The early bird catches the worm. These are some of the old age Proverbs which have been passed on through generations. Today, some people have taken upon themselves to make these proverbs modern and there was born the #modernproverbs.
Fuck Hitler!
Adolf Hitler was born on this day. So, simply for his contribution to the world’s history and humanity’s dark side, FUCK HIM.
It's Clitoris Awareness day!
or as most women call it “No, not there, wait hold it, go back, right there, oh never fucking mind” Day.
Babies? No thanks.
Mate's Aunt: Aww... look at that baby! Don't you think babies are cute?
Mate: Uhk... I hate babies!
Mate's Aunt: What? But WHY?
Mate: All they do is shit, piss and puke and oh yeah cry!
Mate's Aunt: Uh hum... but you do know your gonna have babies one day right?
Mate: Oh please, I have enough trouble pushing out farts, so no thanks, babies.
“Such a familiar situation, such a unfamiliar perspective.”
– Dexter Morgan (Showtime’s ‘Dexter’)
“Uhm… are going to turn of that Call of Duty game and take the trash out or...”
– Bitches
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Happy Passover
Fidel Castro steps down →
Fidel Castro has stepped down. Take a look back at his rise to power with Time’s 1959 cover story.
Funny Disney Dialogues
Cheshire Cat: You know? We could make her really angry! Shall we try?
Alice: No!
Cheshire Cat: But it's lots of fun!
“When a man steals your girl, there is no better revenge than to let him keep...”
– A very wise man
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Volta-ge!
Voltaire: I may not agree with what you have to say, but I’ll defend to death your right to say it.
Mrs.Voltaire: Shut up!
How to get MAC OS X Lion on your current MAC... →
Tumblr - My plans for the future
I’m now quite used to Twitter being a big part of day-to-day life, Tumblr though is going to take some time getting used to. So I’ve decided to take things slow here in the business of posting stuff and give more attention to understanding this new environment.
I’ve already decided to start blogging when I start a new phase in my life - Life in a hostel, away from home, starting...
Asshole on Facebook
Asshole: Hey!
Me: Hi
............................
6 minutes later:
Asshole: Bye!
Nice talking wit u!!!
Me: Fuck you!
Love is blind!
Suzy: I love you!
Me: Why?
Suzy: I don't know! They say "Love is blind".
Me: Oh, really? Then why is lingerie so popular?
Zeus Strikes Goa, Again
Lightning in the sky. Hope thunder and rain joins soon and cools down the land.
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“Women who drink Vodka daily - HOT!”
– Manly part of my brain
My Flickr page →
tumblrbot asked: WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE INANIMATE OBJECT?